Corprorate agenda quit fucking up Christmas!

Ok, I’ve stayed silent enough but tonight the gloves are off. I’ve seen Santa turned into an avenger this year.  I’ve seen has been hacks from Saturday Night Live playing moronic elves in movies.  Hell I even put up with Linus getting his blanket back in a “new” Holiday special.  This I can live with.

However what I cannot abide is  re-branding or should I say requisitioning of the holiday classics from my childhood to new corporate masters.  Yes I get that the classic Christmas shorts from our childhood are awesome property to acquire and license the fuck out of but why in all that is good and holy in this time of year would you turn a half hour cherished Christmas special into a miserable 60 minute shlock-athon  for Macy’s.

Really Macy’s you own it all in half of the country anyways, you have the parades the storefronts .  Do you really need Rodolph the Red Nosed Reindeer too?  Do we need to stop in between frames of duologue so you can shill medium grade cookware?

The season is commercial enough.  Just lay back like the whores you are, open your doors and have a fucking sale.  Don’t ruin Christmas for everyone, by having a damn commercial every three minutes in a children’s show in prime time.

I’m done, everybody carry on shopping.

Related articles

• My Favorite Kinda Messed-Up Christmas Songs (persephonemagazine.com)
• A Jewish parent’s guide to Christmas specials (denverpost.com)

 

Some days we all feel a little like a Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.

I just watched my all time favorite Christmas program, A Charlie Brown Christmas, and in watching it a couple of things dawned on me.

Sometimes we all feel like that sad little tree that Charlie and Linus pick up in the crowded Christmas Tree lot.  You know what I mean, a little or a lot beat up, maybe feeling scrawny on the inside.  Unloved or just a bit crazy around the edges for the holiday season.