Rebuilding


I don’t know how many times I can build a house, fill it up,  destroy it and begin again
.
One day at a time is my mantra right now. Because every time I tear ir down I rip myself  to pieces. Iike a puzzle that goes from ten to 50, to a hundred to a million.  Tearing those pieces apart.  I finally thought that I had put all but a few back into place.  I’m in constant war in my head to stay calm, it’s a whirl wind in there.

I really thought I had calmed the storm with my own control and the love others.  It pains me to write this because it exposes me I feel raw exposed and utterly naked..

But maybe That’s a good thing,  I don’t  know.  I need to trust more and express my love more instead of just being in the picture.
It’s hard for me 

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